ed's e-zine

eclectic deliberation ~ everything dialogue ~ eccentric discussion ~ evolving dialect ~ e.d.'s ezine is a column with many mindsets.

How To Win And Not Compete

August10

I didn’t want to write this morning. Well, maybe I wanted to but I didn’t feel like it was worth my time. Here’s why. Have you ever been going along about your business, making what you feel is progress toward your goal – slow it may be, but you are still pushing forward, then along comes a newbie that seems to make strides toward success in one smooth step, to what felt like ten awkward struggling steps for you?

Someone I know, who has actually been a great supporter of my goals, decided to jot down a few ideas and post them on a blog. The next thing I know his readerS – yes plural – are leaving comments and tweeting about the articles and ReTWEETING about his great blog.

Kudos to his success. Kind of, I mean I’ve been doing this longer and I should have more readers and followers, right! Errr. I’m not a jealous person…am I? I wondered why this bothered me. This person told me I had a gift to reach people, he encouraged me to stick with writing – and my other aspirations, and even supported me to leave behind a corporate career! Now I feel like I am in competition with my biggest supporter.

I tend to overthink issues so you can be certain I put some serious brain juice into resolving my conflicting feelings. I relate  a great deal of my life to running. I’ve come to understand that much of life is a lot like a developing runner. So I asked myself why do I run? I run for the health of it and for the meditation of it, plus it’s somewhat simple to do. Next then, why do I write? I write to learn, practice, it’s good for my mind and I don’t feel like I can do it “wrong” – it’s somewhat easy for me.

OK then, I see that running and writing are both individual tasks that are challenging yet easy enough to make me want to do more. They require dedication and nurturing to develop. But how do I address the feelings of jealousy? It’s not my nature to want another person to perform less than their best.

Back to the running analogy. I would never expect my competition to quit writing, that would be like someone forfeiting a race – not a true win. I also would never expect my competion to hold back, that would be an insulting way to get ahead. At the same time, I would never quit racing because I got beat. There is a finish line to be crossed and I must keep racing my own race in order to pass over it.

I didn’t run Boston two times because I gave up whenever I got passed by another runner. I won’t reach even one reader if I don’t write just because another writer has a larger audience than I do – at the moment.  When I run I expect other great runners to pass me but I also expect to get to the finish line in my best time. The same goes for the other challenges in my life. I expect great people to always be moving around me, but I also expect to get to my destination in my best time.

If you are the only reader that I ever have, I want you to know that I appreciate you. I hope that I make a positive difference in your life. I also hope that my supporters and “competitors” realize how much I appreciate them and that I will be cheering for them with every step of the race.

Life, like running, is easier to deal with if you take it all in stride – each person (runner) has his or her own obstacles to face when moving toward the finish line; beating someone else down only takes time away from your own race. However, an encouraging nod takes less energy, keeps you focused and will get you where you need to be in your own best time.

-ed

posted under General
One Comment to

“How To Win And Not Compete”

  1. On August 17th, 2009 at 9:02 am More How To Win And Not Compete | ed's e-zine Says:

    [...] How To Win And Not Compete is a challenge that requires focus towards a goal without letting external factors interfere. It can be easy to get shaken and discouraged when it feels like all of your efforts keep getting squashed by the “competition”. Don’t give up, you can win without competing. [...]